Monday, January 29, 2024
A question we should all ask ourselves is, what fulfills us? What are the things that feed our soul and make us feel most alive?
When you find these things and this sense of fulfillment, you’ll know. It’s a very warm feeling. You feel complete. It a combination of immense joy and a deep sense of peace. It’s invigorating, and once you’ve tasted it, you’ll crave it.
It’s crucial to keep our souls fed. This involves being deeply connected with ourselves and, potentially, bravely acknowledging the need for change, even when it feels uncomfortable. Realizing that we might not be living to our fullest potential can be intimidating, especially when the path forward is unclear. Yet, what’s even more daunting is the thought of reflecting on our lives with regret or dissatisfaction. The key lies in finding the courage to make necessary changes, pursuing a life that truly satisfies and fulfills us.
In my initial years living in Chicago, I experienced a strong sense of fulfillment. However, as time went on, this feeling of fulfillment became increasingly fleeting, only arising during special occasions such as travel or exceptionally fun times with friends. It was as if fulfillment was tied to unusual circumstances, no longer a product of my everyday life.
My desire to travel grew immensely. Initially, I attributed this wanderlust to my innate curiosity and thirst for adventure. However, looking back, I realize that while my love for exploration was certainly a factor, a significant part of me was also in pursuit of that fulfilling feeling I experienced while traveling.
Throughout my travels, I experienced a profound connection with Europe, a feeling deeper than any other place I visited. Rarely did I travel somewhere and feel a desire to live there more than in Chicago, but Europe was the exception. Life in Europe fed my soul in a way nothing else had. The desire to live in that state of fulfillment, to feel that complete consistently, grew into a craving. Once I came to this realization, I knew that moving to Europe was what I needed to do.
Living here has brought me a level of fulfillment beyond anything I’ve previously known, surpassing even my happiest days in Chicago. Never have I experienced such consistent fulfillment and joy derived simply from the act of living. The idea that one can find pure enjoyment in the regular rhythm of daily life was a concept I hadn’t entirely grasped before now.
This realization has led me to reflect on my past and what I thought made me happy. I know now that this deep sense of fulfillment stems from more than just ‘living in Europe.’ Previously, I had accepted the notion that disliking one’s job was normal — a sentiment that seemed common. Similarly, I thought that day-to-day life was, at times, mundane and unexciting. It didn’t make me unhappy; I just simply didn’t know any better.
It’s very easy to move through life on autopilot, not pausing to consider our true feelings and desires. I was extremely fortunate to have grown up in a community where the traditional markers of success were clearly defined: attend college, secure a job, get married, and start a family. While there’s nothing inherently wrong with this path, it never quite seemed sufficient for me. The idea of living my one, very precious life in a single place, engaged in the same daily routine, particularly in a job that didn’t bring me joy, was unsettling. It made me question why we often feel compelled to follow a prescribed path without considering our own happiness and aspirations.
I moved to Europe with the urge to escape the standard trajectory and fast paced life I was living in Chicago. I wanted to forge my own path. I was seeking a place where I could slow down, live more intentionally, and concentrate on what brings me the most fulfillment.
Part of my vision for a fulfilling life involved the freedom to travel frequently, as traveling had always been a source of immense joy and satisfaction for me. For many years, it was my greatest passion and obsession, and it will always have a special place in my heart. However, ironically, since moving here, I’ve found myself with a newfound desire to stay home more than ever before. This shift in preference, to me, is a clear indication that I am exactly where I’m supposed to be. I’ve found my home.
Recently, I came across a quote on Instagram by @safespacemo that perfectly describes this feeling of finding your home: ‘And then it happens. One day you wake up and you’re in this place. You’re in this place where everything feels right. Your heart is calm. Your soul is lit. Your thoughts are positive. Your vision is clear. Your faith is stronger than ever. And you’re at peace. At peace with where you have been, what you’ve been through. And at peace with where you’re headed.’
This is why I urge us to continue to check in with our souls, to make sure they’re still at home. We, as individuals and as a society, are in a state of constant evolution. In a world that moves so fast, bombarded with ‘rules’ and myriad voices dictating how we should live, it’s all too easy to get swept up in external influences. This is why it’s crucial to pause and introspect, to reconnect with our inner selves and discover our own definitions of a fulfilling life.
Starting this new life here in Amsterdam has been a profound journey of inward reflection and self-discovery. Being here, largely on my own without family, friends, or roommates, has given me the unique opportunity to explore and define my preferences. I’ve had the freedom to determine my own routines and how I conduct myself. In this new environment, where everything is unfamiliar, there’s no longer a predefined way of life to adhere to. Additionally, I have the liberty of living without worrying about how my lifestyle might affect those around me, or being influenced by them in return.
I’ve also been consciously striving not to take things for granted. By fixating only on what we desire but don’t possess, we often overlook the beauty that already surrounds us. Slowing down and truly acknowledging what we have can be incredibly transformative. In today’s digital age, where our phones constantly expose us to what others have and we may lack, it’s easy to lose sight of the blessings we do possess. Recognizing and valuing our current circumstances is vital for a contented life.
Adopting this perspective has led me to fall in love with the little things. And through experimenting and exploring different aspects of who I am, I have fallen in love with myself as well. While many facets of my identity and lifestyle remain as they were, there has been a significant transformation as well. This journey of self-discovery has been about both embracing the familiar and welcoming change, resulting in a profound appreciation for both my life and myself.
This journey has not only brought me greater confidence, but it has also helped me overcome much of my fear of using my voice. I finally feel like I have a meaningful story to tell, one that extends beyond the excitement of travel – a story that could benefit others. And I’m ready to use my experiences and my voice to help those who may feel lost or lack fulfillment, much like I did before. It’s my hope that by sharing my journey, I can provide guidance and inspiration to others on their own journey to fining fulfillment.
xo, mikaela
